“Just keep coming home to yourself, you are the one who you’ve been waiting for.”
~Byron Katie
Do thoughts of not feeling that you are good enough run through your head? Do you continually compare yourself to others? Do you think you don’t measure up? Do you suffer from imposter syndrome? That kind of thinking ruled my life for years and years. Through reprogramming my internal thinking, I’ve slowly discovered those thoughts are false. Here are a few ways I changed my thoughts.
Please note, these tips and tricks are based on my personal experiences. I am not a therapist and am not providing theraputic advice. Please reach out to a professional if you need help.
GRATITUDE
A gratitude journal changed my perspective. At first I thought it was silly and avoided writing in one. Then I thought it would take too much time. Finally I started writing in one right before bed. I would find 5 things for which I was grateful. Some days, I struggled. So, I’d write that I was grateful the day was over. I would write that I was grateful for my bed, or my pillow, or my toothbrush. It didn’t matter, I just found 5 things. As the days progressed, I’d find myself discovering things throughout the day and remembering them so I could write them down in my journal. It was a way to gently nudge negative thinking into a space of gratitude.
JOURNAL
I used to roll my eyes at anybody who told me to journal. I thought it was a waste of time. I thought it wouldn’t be helpful. Finally, someone finally presented good enough reasons for me to start journaling and I’ve never stopped. I never made it into a chore where I had to write every day, but I did write every time I was confused or had an emotion I needed to process. Most of my journaling was done on my computer. Some of my journaling was done with a paintbrush. I let my intuition guide me. I wrote until the emotion was spent. I wrote until a little clarity presented itself. I allowed a stream of consiousness to just flow from my head to my fingers. It helped!
STOP THE COMPARISON GAME
Comparing doesn’t serve mental well-being. Years ago when I ran, a friend told me “there will always be somebody faster than you and somebody slower than you. Just run your own run.” It was such good advice for both running and for living. There will always be someone who is better than you at something and somebody who is worse than you. We have fallen into a trap of comparing bodies, faces, skin, jobs, houses, financial status and everything else and falling short (or being the one on top). But, in any case, comparisons cause stress. Remove yourself from that game and find your own unique qualities. Refer to step one (gratitude).
SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE INFLUENCES
Do you know that story about the frog and boiling water? If you have a frog in a pot of water and slowly turn up the heat, he won’t jump out. But, if you put a frog in a pot of boiling water, he will jump out. I think when you’re surrounded in toxicity, you don’t know that you’re in boiling water. You don’t know it’s bad until you’ve left it. Do the people in your life support you? Do they want the best for you? Do they want you to shine? If not, maybe it’s time to part ways. Leaving toxicity took me a long time, but now that I know differently, I’m so grateful I had the courage to leave.
MOVE MOVE MOVE
When I was depressed, I could barely get myself to work let alone exercise. As I slowly healed my mental state, I started getting enough energy to start walking and exercising. I am a firm believer in movement and the benefits it has for mental well-being. If at all possible, try to move a little. If at all possible, try to get into nature somewhere. Nature and movement truly are the balm that heals.
SHINE
Shine in who you are. Let others see you and celebrate you. You are uniquely you and the world deserves to see the gift that you are.
This enamel is a representation of daring to break those protective walls that we keep around ourselves. The essence revealed beneath that armor shines with beauty (the gold), the eye represents clarity and a willingness to see. It’s a very autobiographical piece and I have a feeling it’s representative of many people’s stories.
If this necklace resonates with you, click on the image to purchase it.
What’s Your Experience?
Do any of these points resonate with you? Where have you learned your most profound lessons?
Beautiful piece. I really appreciate you sharing your story. I’ve had all these feelings ( especially comparison and imposter syndrome ) and your post reminded me of the importance of dealing with them . Thanks
It’s so sad we all seem to experience these things in one way or another. I’m so happy this post inspired you to deal with it. Sending love.